From 2008 To A Particular Day In 2020

Goethe famously said

“Tell me with whom you consort with and I will tell you who you are.”

I know this person earlier this year (I didn't realize that we're mutual on social media, been following each other for years but hadn't had a chance to said 'hi!' until that day) and turns out I like my conversation with him. It's the almost everyday midnight conversation which fortunately, I always waiting for this moment to come. He is unlike any other person that I met along the way. Consider I am lucky to meet him and can brutally honest telling him stories. 

Seneca wrote to a friend:

"Choose someone whose way of life as well as words, and whose very face as mirroring the character that lies behind it, have won your approval. Be always pointing him out to yourself either as your guardian or as your model. There is a need, in my view, for someone as a standard against which our characters can measure themselves. Without a ruler to do it against you won’t make crooked straight."

I remember very vividly a moment in our random midnight conversation when we talked on the phone about everything and both of us didn't realize we've talked for more than 3 hours. Suddenly, I felt like I was surrounded by someone who were a lot know everything than me. He talked with ease about movies, musics (which I guess things he passionately about), about his own thought towards things, and concepts I’d never heard of. He did things I didn’t know how to do. And that is so my worldview expanded, as did a casual pressure to improve and push myself. 

He don’t have to speak the same language as me. I don’t even need to agree with everything he said or did. But I can still learn from him and be motivated by his influence. And I sometimes hate it knowing some of things he said was true and could ease my mind too :)

There was a second half to Goethe’s maxim. 

“If I know how you spend your time,” he said, “then I know what might become of you.”

He tell me a little story of his life, about his past, he tell me how he became the man he is today. But above all the few things he told me, I felt like I know him already. He is so much easy to read or it is because he already a bit opened up and just being who he is that become so predictable to me?

Strange. 

I remember he accompanied me to watch my favorite singer and we had this long night conversation  afterwards and I somehow felt like I was safe. I just being myself. He listen, carefully. Gave me warm and comfort. Knew that for a split second I want to be around him a bit longer. He surprise me with every inch details he remember from my stories. He makes me reconsider my options and I will never regret the decisions I've made just to know him better. 

He is such a gentle; beautiful human being --- doesn't he realize that? Despite the fact that sometimes he annoys me, obviously. Remember the day he took me home, on our way, I told him not to overthink everything. They will be okay eventually. Told him to chose his own battle wisely. Believe in himself that he is capable of doing great things. That he is now a better person than himself before. Because I guess, see, you are now that good dude.

Remember he confess to me he was chatting with another girl before he met me and still kept that girl on the radar, my respond was: It's okay. I am not angry :). Its tickling-ly funny to heard someone asked you whether it is okay or not for that matter (tho I felt a bit appreciated, I wanna cryyy huhuhu). It's because we're adult. And we know whats best for ourselves and I don't want to be that possessive human being. But more than that, I want to trust him. 

Beside of things I said above, I really wish we could go out watching concerts, go to the forest (he know how random I am), watching movies, dancing when we both get a bit drunk, sip another Mocha and Latte at Sabang 16 because I really enjoy our time that day and craving for more hehehe, or strolling around Jakarta with public transportation after this pandemic is over. I really wonder why you said "Yes" to my random invitations ahahahahah but I am glad you did :)

I am glad, that our path crossed. In such a strange way.