Value of A True Friend

As humans we are wired to be social. We want to be around other people. We call these people our friends. A lot of us, myself included, don’t always take the time to appreciate our friends; making sure to value the people who rule and discard the people who suck.

Friends, in my eyes, are one of the most important things you can have in life. I don’t just merely want friends, I need them. I need that constant companionship; those often thought provoking moments late on a Saturday night. Those “listening to music so loud in a car that my ear drums could burst” moments – but I don’t care because I am too happy – those are the great parts of life.

I’ve found that when it comes to friendships, I often befriend people who are similar to me yet still manage to make up for what I lack. I need those types of relationships to add balance to my lives, especially when it gets difficult.

Good friends allow you to make mistakes and love you anyway. However, they aren’t afraid to say you’re being an idiot. They aren’t afraid of hurting each others feelings because good intentions are always obvious. Friends are also my biggest encouragers. They recognize my desire and need to grow and they do so with me. Through growth and change we grow separately so that we can continue to grow together. Friends are there to laugh and cry with you. Isn’t that a wonderful thing? I think so.

We often get so caught up in the trials and tribulations of life that we forget how short it really is. Fill your life with people who add value to it and let go of the ones who do not. When I was nineteen my group of friends lost a great person that we loved. Our lives would never be the same, but in the wake of a tragedy there is always good. We learned to appreciate each other every day. Every, single day.

Life is short – I will never forget that again. I wish I had spent the first nineteen years of my life knowing how valuable friendship is and remembering to tell my friends how much I appreciate them, but I will live the rest of my years knowing and remembering.

I encourage everyone to do the same, because hearing a friend tell you they will always be there for you when you fall is better than hearing it from the cold, hard floor.

deal with these words in mind so far.

“This too shall pass.”

The pain will pass, but so will the other things that I may not always have around to enjoy. It’s just a simple reminder that everything is fleeting and temporary.

Happiness requires the ability to embrace uncertainty.

Happiness has everything to do with just living for today– something most of us are slow to master, if at all. People think that they’ll be happy once they have this thing or that thing, or at the very least, that they know love and success and wonderful things are coming. It’s like we need something to make today’s suffering worth it. But here’s the thing: tomorrow may never come. Love and success and wonderful things may never come, or they may, and they may leave just as quickly. Nothing is certain but what we have today, so it’s the only logical thing to base our happiness on.

Being kind is more powerful than you probably realize.

we -soon- will be amazed at how many people, hearts and opportunities open up when we open our heart to them. It’s a tricky business, kindness, because we live in a world rampant with cruelty, and some may trickle in. Don’t let it close us.

Consider trying to adopt some qualities of the person you’d like to fall in love with. By that I mean, love ourselves first.

We should always be our own person, I don’t mean to say that we should base our own self around someone else, I just mean to propose another way to learn to love ourselves. Very often, the qualities that we would ideally like in a partner are the ones that we wish we had ourselves. Don’t wait for someone else to complete you.

and the most important is.............

Never cease to be thankful.

i should have said 'Alhamdulillah'

life is great. i mean waking up in the morning and doing things.

that's awesome.

we're lucky to exist, you know?

I have a chance to be alive and experience things--which is probably the most under appreciated thing in the whole world (right in front of breakfast for dinner). life is beautiful and it's a shame that it often takes near death experiences or improved circumstances for people to realize it.

i love life, even when i don't have one.

i love it unconditionally and if it were a person, i'd hug it everyday.

not the one arm, side-to-side deal either.. i'am talking two arm embraces, with life's face smothered in my chest so it leaves makeup stains on my shirt.

i want to make good impressions, have the correct answers, make the best decisions, say the right things--be good at life. i know a person or two who seem as if they've got it all figured out. living and handle everything with grace and charisma. YES, i know nobody is perfect do some people just act better than others? maybe that's the best method, to pretend and fake it-- until I make it.

maybe it's been too long. maybe i have crossed the border between 'giving honor to what i had' into 'being pathetically stuck in the past'. i'am sorry if you think that i should be doing other things, enjoying my youth, counting my blessing, and seeing other people. i don't need to hear any motivational quotes about all of the wonderful things i still have to look forward to in life, or that i ended for a reason.

i am currently walking through a tunnel whose end i cannot see,

whose walls feel as cold as they are strangely comforting.

at least in my sadness,

i know what can be expected.

platonic partner

TO:

Natasya Kusuma Yuliandani

Seyla Rizky Amelia

Devika Fajriah

Being a best friends means being willing to learn and adapt, to understand that i cannot control this person or make them be who i want them to be, that i love them precisely because they are their own person. i am the keeper of their secrets, the one they cried in front of, the one they are able to be fully themselves with. i was there through different relationships the way a people weathers different administrations, learning intimately what it is they are looking for and the mistakes they are making — mistakes i know i have to let them make for themselves, just as they allow me mine. Seeing this part of another human being, watching as they turn into people they would not have recognized a few short years ago, is nothing short of a gift. Being a best friend is to be a therapist when we are still so very deeply in the process of figuring things out for ourselves. 

It may sound like a job, and in many ways, it is. It’s not a straight line cutting through my life that starts with “meet this perfect person” and ends with “die laughing as old people drinking milk.” It’s something that demands admitting I am wrong, making sacrifices, and coming to understand that the decisions i would not make for myself may be the right ones for them. 

To have a love like this — one that i cannot control or tie down or even really fully define — is as precious as it is rare. i have endless guidebooks on how to navigate romantic relationships, but so few that tell me what to do when my best friend moves to a new city for the first time and i have to learn how to redesign our patterns and communication to bridge the gap. there are endless questions and challenges to be faced in a best friendship, almost all of which we have to figure out entirely for ourselves. but when everything is going wrong and there is only one person i know i can call who will be there free of judgment, of imposing their worldview on me, i cannot say it is not worth it.

and yet, (for me) working on things is such an essential part of being a best friend.. we will have disagreements, we will want different things, we will fight. 

but after all,  It’s the “I love you” of platonic relationships :)

Tangerine...

i re-watch this movie just about yesterday.....and today. i don't know, i just in love with the story line. and to be honest, i sometimes want to erase some memories. i need Lacuna for real in Indonesia if it's possible. could we watch this movie once again, sun?

we

We've got a lot of memories, 
But there isn't much time.
I'm sitting here thinking of, 
the day we say goodbye.

Our friendship is so strong.
It seems like nothing could go wrong.
We know even when you're gone;
we got the strength to carry on?

Because, we are the best there is yet and,
We are what not a lot of people get and,
We are the thing that people want because, 
We're there for a shoulder to cry on.
No one can make us change our minds,
because we'll be best friends for all time.

It seems there are so many people 
who have a different friend everyday,
we thank God for each other
cause not lots of friends stay this way.

We've had our up and downs.
We've circled round and round.
But then we finally found
a friendship so bound with trust!

Because, we are the best there is yet and,
We are what not a lot of people get and,
We are the thing that people want because, 
We're there for a shoulder to cry on.
No one can make us change our minds,
because we'll be best friends for all time.

We laugh at things no one seems
to think is quite that funny.
We make weird faces sometimes.
We say things people would hide.
We'll be best friends till we die.
When you leave we're going to cry;
but sometimes life is unkind,
least we'll be friends for all time.